A Trip in the Desert

Five young men from MythKey Tech decided to take a spiritual journey after taking a trip to the middle of the desert. Borrowing a page from the wild lives of Jim Morrison and his rhythm section Jeremy Alvin decided it would be a good idea for the boys of MythKey Tech to get lost in the desert and then find themselves by ingesting a plethora of hallucinogens, after watching the movie, The Doors. Over the weekend Alvin talked his tech team into wandering out into Joshua Tree National Park. The team didn’t bring any food, but they weren’t short on psychedelic drugs. Once out in the desert the five men each took a couple of pills of ecstasy, and then brewed up a mix of psilocybin and peyote tea. The unassumably cut with PCP ecstasy kicked in after about forty-five minutes which shifted the gears of the minds of the five men. They began to panic when one of them suggested that they were being hunted by a pack of man-eating mountain lions. Being the most experienced drug user the leader of the crew tried to talk the others down, but it didn’t work. Jeremy Alvin tells the tale:

I’ve always wanted to go out into the desert and trip face so that’s exactly what we did. When we got out far enough we ate the ex then I brewed some mushroom tea and threw in a little peyote. When the ex kicked in I knew the shit was bad, like cut with something. Stan started freaking out thinking a mountain lion was after him, that made everyone else freak out, honestly I got a bit freaked out after listening to him in great detail for about 20 minutes. Just when I calmed everyone down I could feel the ‘shrooms kick in, and I’m guessing so could Stan because there he went running off screaming about mountain lions with George. Kyle ran after them because the fat bastard thought they had candy. Bob was about to get up but I grabbed him and told him to wait, the mescaline was about to kick in. Bob and I grabbed our stuff and went after them and just as the mescaline kicked in Bob fell down a hole. I didn’t see him fall I only found out about it after, at the time I thought that God had vanished him into thin air so I got a little nervous that I was next. After Bob had vanished I just kept walking, until by chance I fell down a hill and into some sort of sweat lodge filled with beautiful naked women. At this point I had thought that I had died and these beautiful women were my gift in heaven because I was such a good person, so I took my clothes off and cuddled up next to a couple of them. That was a big mistake, apparently I stumbled into some kind of feminist retreat, they just beat the shit out of me and left me for dead, of course I thought that I had angered God. After that I started walking again until I came upon a cop, now I really thought that I had pissed God off because I thought that cop was the devil, so I started throwing rocks at him. He just tased me and then arrested me. When he threw me into the Paddy wagon there was Kyle, George and Stan, somehow those idiots killed a bald eagle. Over the radio we heard a call come in about a guy somehow breaking into a secret government lab, which turned out to be Bob just falling into some kind of tunnel. Our lawyer says he can get us a pretty good deal if we go to rehab, that’s fine, I know how to smuggle stuff in.

MythKey Tech have recently been kicked out of rehab for spiking the staffs dinner with LSD, they are now facing more charges. Luckily their tech company blew up, so they have nothing to fear in court.