America’s First Ladyboy

During his stay in East Asia Donald Trump befriended a young Thai person whom he legally adopted. The new addition to Trump’s family will be arriving at Dulles International airport this afternoon. Trump explains:

I’m very excited to tell you all about my adoption of what the Thai people call a ladyboy, I’m not sure if he’s a man who grew a pair of breasts, or if she’s a woman who somehow grew a penis. I’m not really sure, so to ensure that I don’t offend anyone I’m going to call him or her, it. I got to know this young it last time I visited the Orient and we bonded as we both share the same political views, and we both have a strong business sense. This adorable young it just turned 21 so when it arrives here in our great country I will be throwing it a wonderful birthday, and welcome to America, and welcome to the family party all in one. You’re all invited to join us for its celebration via your television and my twitter feed. To answer your questions on what its name is I will tell you that it has decided to drop its Thai name and go by the name Adélka Trump, which we agreed fit in with our family more than a name I can’t pronounce. I know Adélka is a girl’s name which is fitting as it looks female when it’s wearing clothes, but I tell ya in the locker room it’s gonna put most of you men to shame.

A clue to the reason for Trump’s new family addition also came to the surface in his televised interview.

I know a lot of Americans hate me and that’s fine, but I do hope that Adélka will show these creeps picketing me in the streets that I too am sensitive to the LGBTQ community and their concerns. I now have a ladyboy as part of my family, who will be living in the White House with me and my actual family, so please respect my understanding of all the non-regular genders out there. I know that more of you turn up everyday, and I’m okay with that. So please start to respect my authority, I don’t find it amusing anymore.

Several organizations will be awaiting Trump when he is there to greet Adélka at the airport to protest his exploitation of her, but most will be gathered to catch a glimpse of the world’s most famous first ladyboy.